The World's Funniest Athletic Supporters

 Volume 1, Issue 35  February 5, 2002


New England Pats: The Greatest Show On Turf
Oxygen Holds "Estrogen Party XXXVI" in Protest of Super Bowl
Activists Against Abuse of Artificial Turf Protest Super Bowl XXXVI
WR Terry Glenn Offers St. Louis Prosecutors Info on Pats Fix in Exchange for Immunity
Vinatieri to Promote Chunky Soup and Satan Worship
Kurt Fought Ty Law and Law Won

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Warner Blames God for Loss

Claims Pats had Nothing to Do with Victory; Proclaims Adam Vinatieri the Anti-Christ
   St. Louis Rams Quarterback Kurt Warner said in a press conference Monday that after Sundays loss to the Patriots, he just doesn't feel as if Jesus is watching over him any more.
   Warner, who spent years as a stockboy before becoming an NFL QB, Super Bowl MVP and Chunky Soup Spokesman, said that "Although, I always felt that God was with me, guiding me through my struggles and helping me achieve my dreams,  I just didn't feel his presence on Sunday. I believe God is truly dead."
   Warner stunned reporters when, as he ended the press conference, he grabbed the microphone, pointed toward the heavens and screamed, "Thanks a lot, Jesus!"
   Later that day, Jesus issued a statement in response to Warner's attacks: "I ain't dead, you dumb ass -- Sunday's my day off."


Top Super Bowl XXXVI Moments

~ Tom Brady does "the Cabbage Patch"
~ Mike Martz shreds Bible-sized playbook at press conference
~ Pat Summerall inexplicably refers to ball as "jello pudding"
~ All those cool Annette Funicello Pepsi commercials
~ Bill Parcells stalks Belichick a la The Fan
~ Barry Manilow sings stirring, patriotic rendition of Copacabana; Terry Bradshaw left in tears

Job of the Week

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The National hockey association in Nigeria seeks a professional coach/technical advisor, preferably expatriate. Interested applicants should please contact Mr Okeke

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