NEW YORK, NY – "Nah, nah, that's all wrong," screamed Cameron Tinsley, while reviewing a group of young Broadway hopefuls. The producer is in the middle of conducting tryouts for "Dumb Man," a musical based upon the life of ex-Nets star Jayson Williams. "I'm trying to capture complete stupidity and recklessness on the stage," explains Tinsley, observing several tall performers flopping about the stage floor like fish out of water.
"We are trying to personify the aura of Jayson in broad brush strokes. This is a man who injured his body repeatedly as a result of reckless play. Then he ended a human life by acting the same way off the court. Disarray and disorder are the key components to making ‘Dumb Man' a successful production."
Tinsley will portray Williams using an assortment of homeless men wielding cap guns and jumping about the stage. One such performer, known only as ‘Leo,' shares a special bond with the player:
"Jayson once gave me a thousand dollars while I was panhandling outside the China Club. He had accidentally shot me in the leg beforehand, and I guess it was his way of paying me back. Not many guys who shoot you will do something like that. He's a first class act -- all the way."
Composing the score for ‘Dumb Man' are noted artists JayZ and Chuck D. "I am writing the words and music to this show based on first hand experience," explains JayZ. "Jayson accidentally pistol whipped me while I was sitting in his living room. He was just practicing pistol whipping an imaginary guy, and I guess I got too close. Still, Jayson is cool"
Chuck D is also a Williams expert. "Yo, when we wuz bachelors, Jay accidentally slept with my girl. We wuz at his house and he was just trying to be friendly. He's a funny guy."
Directing the musical is NBA great Patrick Ewing. "I hope this show makes Jayson popular in the pen," said Old Man Winter.
A preview of the finished product will be broadcast on NBC. When asked about his favorite Williams anecdote, Dick Ebersol, president of NBC sports, fondly reminisces: "I liked Jayson. You know, we once accidentally hired him to work for us. I don't know why or how that happened. Hah!"
Dumb Man debuts March 15 at Square in the Circle Theatre. Tickets start at $15, but admission is free for anyone who turns in a firearm at the door.
Luscious Rosenbaum has proposed that Olden Polynice, who once accidentally played the role of a Sheriff, be cast in the lead role.
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