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November 23, 2002

Baseball: a thinking man's game?
There are a few things I hate in life. One of them is people who think that baseball is more of a "thinking man's" sport than football. Give me a fucking break. Every team in the NFL is throwing out complex defenses and offenses every play. Its a chess match between the offensive and defensive coordinators. The variety of play calling on both sides of the ball is unbelievably complex. Just watch one of the good NFL shows on ESPN or HBO where they break down the plays to get just a glimmer of the strategy invloved. OK, so what do Tony LaRussa and all other baseball managers do? They look at statistics. Baseball strategy is all about the numbers. So its the 6th inning and the big hitter from the other team sucks against lefties. You put in a lefty. Its not genius, its the right thing to do. Simple example but it gets the point across. Football is the real thinking man's sport.

November 22, 2002

Excerpt of David Wells, drunk off his ass, 911 call [via Smoking Gun]
Operator: Police operator 139, what is the emergency?
Wells: I just got my, I just got offended.
Operator: Now what do you mean you've been offended?
Wells: I just got, I just got my teeth knocked in, alright?
Operator: Okay. You need an ambulance?
Wells: Send the fucking cop. Nine motherfucking one one.

November 21, 2002

Kicker and Punter Feud about to Explode
Carolina punter Todd Sauerbrun and the brothers/kickers Gramatica [Martin (Bucs) and Bill (Cards)] has escalated following post FG celebrations and now post game tauntings after their recent losses to the Bucs. Bucs Gramatica had to be restrained by his teammates from going after Sauerbrun following the game. When reached for comment, Sauerbrun said "He had everyone holding him back to make it look good. I don't know who this kid thinks he's playing with but I'm not the most mild-tempered guy. If he would have said the wrong thing to me there's no telling what I might have done.''

Whatever it would have been, I'm not sure you should be scared of the punter, well, I guess, unless you're a kicker.

November 20, 2002

Smoking Gun: Michael Jordan extortion lawsuit

Federal Judge Predicts Super Bowl
Frank Easterbrook, federal judge on Seventh Circuit Court of Appeals has conducted an incredibly scientifically advanced analysis of the relationship between performance and appearing on national television. Easterbrook notes that for each of the last three seasons, the eventual Super Bowl winner was a team (the Rams, then Ravens, then Patriots) downplayed by the league in terms of national television exposure. Based on his analysis, Easterbrook picks the Saints to meet the Bolts in the 2003 Super Bowl.

Notice, however, that he fails to predict a winner. He must have read Elias Sports Bureau Chief Steve Hirdt's article: A No Win Situation for Super Bowl Hopefuls This Year which provides Ten Simple Rules that, taken together, forestall the possibility of any NFL team taking home the Lombardi trophy this year.

November 19, 2002

NFL Endorsement Curses
We previously told you that the MADDEN NFL video game cover jinx will mean the end of Marshall Faulk this season. Now Dan Lewis is reporting that the Chunky Soup curse has claimed Donovan, Jerome, TD and Warner.

UPDATE: After some research it seems that Fistful of Sports and not Dan Lewis's SportsBlog or StarkDavingMad is the proper source for the Curse of Chunky Soup.

Dr. Gay Lights Up Nebraska Scoreboard
A University of Nebraska physics professor's knack for explaining the science of football has brought his image to the scoreboard of Cornhuskers games and, via an NFL program, to TV screens in 190 countries. [via WSJ]

November 17, 2002

Writer Details Exploits of Twisted Fans in North America
Fans such as William Ligue Jr. and son are part of a growing group of fans unable to distinguish participation from spectatorship in the confusing haze brought to you by Budweiser, Jackass, Reality TV and a growing number of Owners willing to display decibel meters to egg on crowd noise, turn up the volume on baby sound effects when a player whines, juice up the thumping music during timeouts and hand out ThunderStix before the game. [via NYT, sub req'd]

See also When Fans Attack: a history of fan violence at sporting events and Sports Fans: The Psychology and Social Impact of Spectators and Rowdy Football Fan Roundup by Sports Fan Magazine.

When Did ESPN Stop Doing Sports and become MTV? [via Slate Sports Nut]

Miami (OH) Suspends Coaches That Attacked Fans
Athletic director offers excuses for coaches’ behavior in postgame brawl against Marshall. [via SFM]

When Twisted Fans Attack!
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