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Tues, Aug 28, 2001

  NBC Set to Announce New Sports Reality Show

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Described by Roker as ‘Survivor for the thinking man,” C.I. involves concussed athletes such as Troy Aikman, Eric Lindros, and Steve Young using tools they probably haven’t used lately: their brains.

by Butch Rogaine

     TV personality Al Roker appeared at an NBC press conference today to announce the birth of “Concussion Island,” a new reality television show making its debut this fall.    

Al Roker is the ringmaster of Concussion Island.

     “Concussion Island,” hosted by Roker, was actually filmed earlier this year on a small islet off the coast of Florida. The objective of the game is to find and eliminate the least brain damaged athlete via an assortment of trials and memory tests. In a strange twist, the show’s contestants were not initially told the rules of the game (though it is unlikely that, if told the rules, most would be able to comprehend or retain them anyway). All the “Concussioners” knew was that the winner would get a valuable CAT SCAN machine complete with free delivery and installation in his rec room.

     Unlike ‘Survivor,’ playing ‘Concussion Island’ required very little skill and, unbeknownst to the athletes, failure was the way to win. According to the show’s producer, movie director David Lynch, each athlete was placed in luxurious accommodations on the islet. The contestants were given individual tasks to perform throughout the day, such as ironing a shirt, folding laundry, boiling water, and watching an episode of PBS’ “Antiques Roadshow.” 

When quesitoned about his role on Concussion Island, Lindros could not even recall taking part in the show. It's no surprise that he is an odds-on favorite for the show's CATSCAN prize.
     One person was eliminated each day by the host rather than by group vote. At the end of each day, “Concussion” host Roker interviewed each athlete separately in “The Recollection Room.” Roker would probe the contestants’ minds to see which of their daily tasks they could recall performing. The person who remembered the most of his day would be asked to leave.

     Who won the contest? Don’t ask the contestants themselves. Upon being interviewed, several denied even having been in a contest or on an island. All we know is that those who recall participating are not likely to have won the prized CATSCAN.


Butch Rogaine
suffered a minor concussion while writing this article after an Al Roker fart knocked him to the floor.
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Issue #14

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