Willy’s Wild NFL Predictions 2002

Willy P. Archive


OK, many of you have been writing in to TwistedFans blasting Willy P. for his NFL predictions. True…while our readers may not have been able to look past the laughable intro (“J-E-T-S, Jets! Jets! Jets!) and Willy’s sad Vikings prediction (“Mike Tice will whip these boys back into shape quicker than Denny Green downs jello shots at a UMinn frat party”), a lot of his picks were actually pretty good! Willy’s back to remind you that some of his picks weren’t all that bad! New commentary is in bold.  

Willy’s Top Ten Picks

1.  Browns. 8-8. I feel like I'm the only person who's not on the Browns' jockstrap this year….Expect an unexpected letdown this year.

     Everyone and their mom was picking the Browns to make the playoffs this year. Not me! Looks like they’re on their way to an 8-8 season after all, boo-ya!!!

2.  Bears 9-7. Playing 16 away games … has "transitional" written all over it … give it another year, Chi-town.

     A similar situation with the Bears.  Same record as Cleveland —and muddled in mediocrity.  You heard it here first, baby!

3.  Bills. 9-7. Hmm...Drew Bledsoe, Eric Moulds, Peerless Price? Even if their defense sucks this year...this reenergized offense should post some solid victories this year.

     Can you say…money?  How money was I on that?!  Damn.

4.  Panthers. 5-11. John Fox will have a respectable first season in Carolina.  And Julius Peppers will earn rookie of the year honors.

     Did you see that last sentence?  Sheeit… And the five wins I gave Carolina is twice as many as any “NFL expert” gave them!  Damn I’m good!!!

5.  Falcons. 10-6. There's something happy brewing in Atlanta these days. You just wait and see. Dan Reeves will have these guys back in the playoffs again.

     The Falcons worst days are behind them.  I can’t wait until how genius I will look here by season’s end.

6. Cardinals. 9-7. I like this Dave McGinnis guy. You can bet your ass that he'll have these guys up to the challenge of their new division.

     True…the Cardinals still suck.  But they’re leading they’re division and I predicted a winning season!  They’re on pace to do that.  Damn I’m good!!!!

7.  Lions 6-10. I actually feel like the Lions could do even better than 6-10 year, but I'm playing it safe here. Az Hakim was a beautiful pickup for them.

     Again I pride myself that I gave Detroit 6 wins when everyone and their mom gave them 2 or 3.  Go Lions!!!

8. Redskins. 7-9.  This defense will grow so tired of watching their futile offense, that they will simply give up. Snyderville will be in shambles yet again.

     I gotta throw the Redskins on this list.  Just because I hate them so much.  

9.  Seahawks. 7-9. Mike Holmgren after Green Bay is like Grand Funk Railroad after the Seventies. It just don't work. His plans to get back to the Big Game will be derailed yet again by ironic twists of fate. (Should've stayed in Green Bay, Mike!)

     Again, my comments are pretty much dead-on.  Gotta respect Da Willymeister!!!

10.  Saints. 9-7.  The Saints will come close to making the playoffs this year…No Ricky? no problem.

     Boo-ya…Deuce McAllister.  I be smart!!!

Where Willy Was Kinda Right

Rams. 10-6. The Rams will repeat their 2000-2001 stunt of trying to be a successful playoff team as a wild card. Only this time they will do better than losing the first round (as they did to the Saints two years ago). This time it'll be the NFC championship game.

     I’m right because I’m the only one who sensed that something didn’t smell right, and thus I didn’t pick the Rams to win their division. Look where they are now!  At least I wasn’t a sucker who picked them to win their division…suckers!!

Where Willy has a Valid Excuse

Jaguars. 3-13. Ooooh, don't look now. But the Jags are freefalling faster than Mark Brunell's knees in front of the Pope. And the Pope might just come in handy for this team, by the way. Start praying now, Jaguars fans.

     Three words…Fred Freakin’ Taylor!  I assumed he wouldn’t be healthy this year! Where would the Jags be then?  Jesus, oh, about…3-13!  Taylor, you’ve screwed me the last three years of fantasy football, now you’re healthy!  Bah!!  Screw you Fred.

Another Comment I’m Sticking by

Bengals. 9-7. Yes, the Bengals. Humor me a little bit, O football gods up high. Gus "The Answer" Frerotte and a newly revamped defense WILL resurrect this sorry franchise this year! They're due, due, due! Stop laughing now.

     A boy can dream, can’t he?  Bengals, go 9-1 over the last ten games and make the playoffs! Yeah!!!!

Gus Frerotte.  Hah.

See Willy's Original 2002 NFL PREDICTIONS and Mr. Bozack's 2002 NFL  PREDICTIONS

Willy P. Ondabich congratulates himself! 
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Willy’s Wild NFL Predictions 2002

Tupa Autographs Football After Awesome Punt

Joe Buck Suffers Groin Injury Announcing World Series

Knicks Plan to Reach Finals By Catching Opponents Napping

Garcia Ex Runs Into Niners Huddle, Requests Closure

The Back Page

2001 NFL Season Article Roundup

Fantasy Fantasy Football Craze Ready to Sweep Nation



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