Some Quotes
Insight from Knicks coach Don Chaney: "When you don't stop people and you can't score on the other end, you're in trouble.''
Comprehension of Chinese from Shaq: "Tell Yao Ming, 'ching-chong-yang-wah-ah-soh.'''
Perspicacity from Philly: "The Rocky statue outside of the Vet moves more than Brad Johnson."

Posted by K-Cebo at 9:09:01 PM

Clearly Newsworthy

Tough Header

Posted by K-Cebo at 7:50:34 AM

Chucky Don't Play
"We're not going to sit here and try to justify what happened two or three years ago, or what happened earlier this year," said Bucs coach Jon Gruden. "It's irrelevant now. We respect Philadelphia for what it has done this year, not in the past. What happened there before has no bearing." "We're going to get on the plane, and we're going to play them anywhere, play them anyplace. Whether it be in 'The Vet' or on the Walt Whitman Bridge, we're going to be there."

Posted by K-Cebo at 6:11:04 AM

Clippers to Draft Iverson's Sperm with Second Pick in NBA Draft ::TF Redux::
LOS ANGELES—L.A. Clippers VP of Basketball Operations Elgin Baylor has confirmed reports that the team will draft the sperm of Philly 76ers guard and 2000-2001 NBA League MVP Allen Iverson with their #2 overall pick in next week's 2001 NBA Draft in New York City. Iverson's Sperm will be the youngest player(s) ever drafted in league history. Citing a trend towards an increasingly younger pool of lottery picks, Baylor stated: "This is definitely the right move for us at this time. We feel like we should get a head start on other teams, like the (Atlanta) Hawks." Atlanta had reported earlier in the day that they will draft several of Larry Johnson's illegitimate sons, who are now in grade school.

The Answer's Sperm will be injected into eggs donated to the Clippers by the WNBA's four-time champion Cynthia Cooper. Dr. Iminto Mitochondria, at Houston's Mercy Hospital, will be performing the test-tube and fertilization procedures. Darius Miles, the Clips 19-year-old phenom who currently is the youngest player taken with the hightest draft pick --at #3 in 2000, commented: "For reeeaall, I hope he's good at Playstation 2, cause Lamar (Odom) sucks. But I ain't changing no diapers, we'll leave that to Cherokee (Parks)."

This past year, the Clippers fielded the second youngest team in league history which included three starters who could not even legally purchase alcohol, making the average age of the team an astounding 21. Tomorrow, with the new addition, their average age will drop to 15. Upon hearing the news, Michael Jordan stated that he will begin working with a team of Welsh Geneticists to perfect 5 clones of himself to play for the Wizards in the 2016-2017 season. It is also rumored that MJ may again come out of retirement that year to play with himself(ves). NBA President David Stern, who has unsuccessfully pleaded with the NBA Players Association to set age restrictions on players entering the Draft, has, in response to the recent developments, asked for his binky.

Posted by K-Cebo at 12:36:19 PM