Davis Loves Tiger At Muirfield



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Issue #55

Is it Tiger's signature smile that has Love crapping his pants?
     In a refreshing display of complete honesty rarely seen in sports,
Davis Love III admitted that he cannot compete with Tiger Woods and is playing for second place at this week's British Open at Muirfield.

     At a press conference held earlier today, Love said "I don't know what makes him so tough on Sunday, but no one else has it.  It must come from his background, growing up on the tough streets of the ghetto." 

     After reporters explained to Love that Woods grew up in the quiet California suburb of Cypress, Love still seemed in awe.  "Well, then maybe its his complexion that scares the hell out of the rest of us.  I didn't see many like him where I grew up.  When I see him walking the fairways, I am somewhat frightened, but strangely aroused."

     Love's British Open press conference covered a variety of topics, including the recent trend in professional golf to have laser-eye surgery to remedy the nuisance of wearing contacts on a windy golf course.  However, Love seemed at a loss for words when a reporter from TwistedFans.com asked Love if he would undergo surgery to remove the
large 2-by-4 jammed in his backside.

Michael DeMone is TwistedFans.com's newest contributor.
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